Chocolate Covered Baby

It’s cold.  The temperatures have me anxiously looking forward to spring and I’m not the only one.  The other day I noticed a box of Cadbury Creme Eggs.  Oh, heaven help me now – here comes the Easter candy!  There’s nothing more creepy than the thought of a mutant bunny breaking into your house and leaving candy.  Seriously?  Don’t we teach kids not to take candy from strangers but it’s completely okay to accept candy from a mutant rabbit?

I admit, I love Easter candy.  I could live without peeps, who likes marshmallows covered with sand anyway?  Robin’s Eggs are delicious but my favorite will always be the Cadbury Creme Egg.  My husband’s favorite is the infamous Chocolate Creme Egg.    Why is it infamous?  Well, there’s a story!

My oldest son was 2.  I had picked up a Chocolate Cream Egg for my hubby at the store the night before and set it on the counter.  I got up early to make breakfast and my son walked in to the kitchen and snatched up the egg.  I scolded him and told him to take it to his daddy.  The last I knew my husband was wide awake and getting out of bed right behind me.

So, for the next 20 minutes I enjoyed the silence while cooking breakfast.  When I was done, it dawned on me that it was quiet – too quiet.  Any mother of toddlers knows that silence is not golden – it’s suspicious.

I went to get my husband, our baby, and our 2-year-old for breakfast when I stumbled upon a terrifying sight!  There was my toddler, on my side of the bed, covered from head to toe in chocolate.  It wasn’t just on him, but also on my sheets, pillows and even on my husband!  Apparently, my husband had fallen back to sleep and then slept through the entire dissection of his chocolate cream egg by a very sneaky toddler.

Here’s the twist…  My son had also filled his diaper with a rather stinky poo.  It stunk to high heaven!

So there was my toddler, covered from head to toe in a brown substance and stinking like a country outhouse.  I exclaimed, “Oh my God!”

My husband sat up, saw our son, and smelled the lovely opulence of the diaper.  His face contorted into a grand look of disgust as he yelled out, “Heather, he’s eating it!”

My reaction?  I dipped my finger into the brown mess on my son and tasted it.  “Hmm… not bad.  Honey, you should try this.”

I didn’t know my husband could turn that shade of green.

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